*WARNING - THIS BLOG IS ABOUT AS HAPPY AS THE FIRST 10 MINUTES OF A DISNEY MOVIE. PROCEED WITH CAUTION*

Spring and summer in my backyard means a lot of things: days lounging on the patio in front of a big movie screen and fire pit; several garden beds with blooming perennials and seedling volunteers; the satisfying smell of the earth as I dig up weeds and plant new flowers; and more wildlife than I could usually see walking through the woods. We have chipmunks, rabbits, squirrels, more species of birds than I can count (including woodpeckers that have put a pretty big dent in my shed), and a family of deer that has, for the last 6 years, given birth to a new generation of fawns in our bushes each spring.

Each year our deer have gotten more comfortable in our yard, and this year they have confidently roamed around, grazing and nursing while we have been back there working. We have felt particularly special when doe and fawn have come back, nursed, and then the doe has left the fawn with us, giving us a glance as she leaves the yard as if to say, "Hey I'm going to run some errands, could you watch him for a bit?" We've been able to walk right up to him and take pictures and I love going back and looking at the development of this wobbly, scrawny fawn who could barely open his eyes, to this bright-eyed, attentive creature who can already leap a 4-foot fence after just a few short weeks of life.

A few days ago I was on my way home from church and just as I was about to turn on to my own street, I saw my sweet fawn across the street, headed toward my yard. I was horrified as I watched it bound into traffic and I was crushed as I saw him tossed across the hood of an oncoming car. I parked my car and then walked up the street to see if there was any hope to be found. By the time I got close to the scene, several cars had stopped, including the woman who had hit him. As I approached, he managed to stand up and he slowly made his way through my neighbor's yard to my fence with a noticeably broken leg and a bloody nose. I've spent a lot of time with wildlife, and even though he was still alert and moving around, I knew there were no guarantees for his long-term survival. 

More immediately, though, there was now a crowd gathered on my street. I'm sure they all wanted to have a part in helping, but I really wanted to handle him without a group of well-intentioned strangers. While I assured the onlookers that my veterinarian was right down the street and convinced them I would do what I could to get him there, the woman whose car had hit him stood there, tears streaming down her face, quiet sobs escaping her lungs. I wanted to grieve on my own. I was angry. I was devastated. Had she been paying attention? Was she going too fast? I didn't know. There was no way I could possibly re-live the situation through her eyes. I couldn't begin to estimate what she had gone through in that moment.

So ... there was nothing to be gained by spreading my own grief and anger to her. Instead, in a moment of clarity and calm, I decided to stand with her and reassure her. I didn't know if there was anything she could have done differently, but I told her there was nothing she could have done. I didn't know if he would survive, but I told her that he seemed ok and that he had a safe place to be in my backyard. I didn't know if I would be able to catch or contain him to get him medical attention, but I assured her that I would and that he would get the care he needed. There was nothing comforting to me about my own words, but there was no reason to send her away with her own grief when it was so easy for me to ease it by spending a few extra moments with her.

The fawn left my yard with his mother and I don't know how he has done over the last few days. I've been watching and ready to fulfill my promises of help if I could, but I know nature will take its course. I've been thinking a lot about my interactions with people and how often I'm confronted with the choice to either spread my own grief and anger about things or find a way to provide comfort in a situation. How often does a post on social media get my blood-pressure boiling and I could reply with a vicious and brilliantly cutting attack on the person who posted, or I could find some words to redirect the conversation and try to show that there is common ground. I don't have most of the answers (even though sometimes I like to think I do). But I always have a choice with my words and what I choose to put out in the world.

Over the past few months I feel like I have been spending a lot of time looking in the rear view mirror. I have been looking back on all of the amazing experiences that I have had at Lord of Life as your intern for the past two years because what is ahead is frankly scary and unknown. Will I get a call as a pastor? Will the congregation embrace me and my family the same way you all have? What will church look like at this new congregation amid all of the COVID-19 concerns? Who will record ridiculous children’s sermons with me? Looking forward is scary because we don’t know what to expect. So we look into the rear view mirror to see all of the good, comforting memories that bring us security, peace, and joy. It is so much easier to wish for what has been, rather than to venture out into the unknown.

I am reminded of the story of the Israelites after they are released and then escape from Pharaoh (Exodus 16). The Israelites were formerly slaves to the Pharaoh and lived under harsh conditions from which they prayed and groaned loudly for God (Yahweh) to rescue them. Once they made it out of Pharaoh’s grasp they were told that Moses would deliver them to their promised land, filled with milk and honey and all of the good things they never had. But if you know the story, after roaming around in the wilderness for a while, surviving on only bits of manna that God provided each day, the Israelites started to look into their rear view mirror. They told Moses that they wish they had never left Pharaoh because of how good they had it there compared to where they were now. Looking forward into the unknown, even with the promise of something great in the future, was still scarier than looking back into the past and wishing for “the good ole days.”

In my own rear view mirror I have been thinking about all of the amazing experiences I have had at Lord of Life, too many to list. Each memory brings a smile to my face and I long for those days to return. But sometimes the rear view mirror plays tricks on us. What is shown in the mirror is not actual reality. In fact, most rear view mirrors even give a warning, “objects in mirror are closer than they appear.” Most often, when we look to the past, we only focus on the good things and forget about the hard times. So of course, it seems like things were better back then when we selectively take out the difficult or traumatic events that occurred during that same time. But, I would argue, those sad times have had just as much of a formational impact on us as the good times and we shouldn’t neglect to remember those as well. 

So where am I going with all of this? Lord of Life is moving forward. It is moving forward without me as a pastoral presence. It is moving forward with welcoming a new set of gifts and talents in Intern Alec. It is moving forward by carefully trying to find safe ways for us to worship in person again. It is becoming something new, but is not giving up all of the memories that have brought us to this point. We cannot be scared of the new future of our congregation because God is calling us boldly into that new territory. When times are rough, like they are now, we should also not be too quick to want to rush back to the old ways of doing things, because like Pharaoh, they could present regression disguised as comfort. So keep those memories from the rear view mirror near and dear to your heart, but let’s also keep our eyes on the road ahead of us as we seek to “live, share, and celebrate, with all people, God’s love in Jesus Christ” in new and exciting ways.

Always with you in the rear view,

Pastor Corey

This reflection by Lily Wu was written a few weeks ago, prior to the murder of George Floyd. While we are heartened to see that the egregious racism against the Black Community has finally drawn national attention and scrutiny, we acknowledge that racism still exists against all people of color.  

Editor’s note: COVID-19 has uniquely impacted communities of color and their lives and ministries. In this series, we will feature ELCA Racial Justice reflections from each of the ELCA Ethnic Specific and Multicultural Ministries associations, focusing on racism and racial disparities amid the coronavirus.

In the heated battle of humanity versus COVID-19, the Zoom app is booming. People want to see and be seen. It’s a big learning curve for many—but free and open to everyone!

Indeed, being seen, and even loved, is one of life’s deepest joys. Conversely, not being seen, yet being hated, is a heavy stressor.

The surge of hate crimes against Asians in the United States shows that many people doubt Asian Americans as neighbors, friends and fellow citizens. No matter who we are, if we have a “Chinese” face, our personal safety and well-being are at risk—not only from coronavirus but from coronavirus rage.

The Asian Pacific Policy & Planning Council reported that two-thirds of those attacked are not even Chinese but of other Asian ethnicities. Spitting, verbal abuse, harassment, bullying, beatings. A 6-year-old boy was stabbed in the head and required stitches. Women are three times more likely to be harassed than men. One woman suffered severe chemical burns when a man deliberately threw acid at her.

I’ve been confronted and assaulted before. U.S. history and my own history tell me that living in my own city, my own country, is seriously dangerous. Now it is even worse.

My heart sank when elected leaders used such racist terms as “kung flu” and “Chinese virus.”

Their ill-chosen words set up Asian Americans to be mocked and blamed. Angry people may choose at any time to lash out at us. Anyone targeted for violence knows what I mean. It feels as if just being out in public will mean having to run a gauntlet.

Meanwhile, the Asian American community is very diverse: culturally, geographically, socioeconomically. Some may say we have never experienced racism. But many will confirm the pain it causes when it does strike.

Please help to spread the word that people who “look Chinese” are not the virus. We are not COVID-19 carriers just because we are Asian. We are not the enemy. We are Asian Americans, trying to “flatten the curve” like mostly everybody else.

It’s ghastly how many people have died so suddenly in Queens, N.Y. A dozen tractor-trailer-sized trucks—mobile morgues—were parked outside Elmhurst Hospital to store the bodies of the dead. I used to live in this immigrant enclave area of Queens, one of the most diverse counties in the United States. I loved the vibrant Chinese and Latino life there. Now it’s shut down, and the people are reeling.

My church is located there. Eight blocks from the hospital, St. Jacobus Lutheran Church offers one of only two food pantries still open in Elmhurst, serving 100 to 300 families per week. There are more young families now, many of whom are Latino.

For many of these families, there are two or three generations living in an apartment, with no work to be had. Available resources do not match the needs. “The virus has exposed what’s been there all along,” said Joe Mantovani, pastor of St. Jacobus. “How high the rents are. How hard it is to find enough work to feed their families.”

Many Asian American families citywide are also at risk of starvation and homelessness, reported the Coalition for Asian American Children & Families. They are among the Americans of all backgrounds who work for low wages and tips with no safety net. The struggle is fierce for too many, including African Americans dying in high numbers.

We are trying, as New York Governor Andrew Cuomo urges, to be “tough, smart, disciplined, united and loving.” I know my resilience can happen only in a collective. Every day I give God thanks for my husband, my family, my friends, my pastor and the caring people I don’t know who work for peace and justice.

All of us in the United States have a long way to go—some much further than others. If we look to see the good in others, honor each other’s humanity and work against poverty, despair and racism, we will make great strides for a better future for all.

I wish every Zoom user knew that a Chinese American, Eric Yuan, created the app. It’s just one example of what Asian Americans can contribute to the United States and to the world. I pray that more of us will “Zoom together for racial justice,” whether literally or not. “Join the Zoom meeting,” I’d invite. “I’ll bring Chinese food, you bring whatever you like and we’ll share.”

It could be a big learning curve at first. But with God as our host, we cannot fail. Free and open to everyone!

Lily R. Wu
Lily R. Wu is a Chinese American Lutheran who has worked as a church communicator for more than 40 years. She also served as vice president of the ELCA Association of Asians and Pacific Islanders.

Reproduced with permission from Living Lutheran magazine.

This is a season for listening to one another, especially in the Church. Listening can be difficult, especially when it draws our attention to things we are reluctant to hear.

On Pentecost Sunday, I focused on the coming of the Holy Spirit, gifting new life and skills to the Church. The Spirit of God is always at work, but especially as we consider Acts 2:1-21 during this season of life and ministry in America, how is God equipping us with a new language of heart, mind, and lips? 

On the heels of my reflection, I was grateful to receive this email from one of our families, this week:

Thanks to you or whoever has organized the upcoming racial discussion series. I’m not sure how much I’ll be able to participate, as my daughter is not yet aware of these kinds of issues and we’re always together these days…

I did want to mention something that I’ve observed once before (maybe when there was another race-related initiative maybe a year or two ago?), which is sometimes communicating with the congregation as if everyone in it is white. 

I noticed this in reading the last couple of emails, mentioning ‘our whiteness.’ [Lord of Life] is obviously a vast majority white congregation, but I feel that assuming the whiteness of the reader/listener actually excludes the people of color who are part of the congregation (or would like to be). 

If my daughter were just a couple years older, I could imagine her getting confused and asking if she was allowed to participate in such a discussion because she is (self-identified) brown, or even wondering if she were as much a part of the congregation because it sounded like they said everyone is white but she is brown. 

I’m of course speaking from my own perspective/interpretation and have no idea how the few other non-white families might feel, but did want to raise the observation, as it came up once before for me as well some time ago.

Just some thoughts on working towards an even more inclusive language and approach that both acknowledges many of us likely sharing structural privilege of race, while maintaining equal space for those of different races/who have different race-related experiences. Not an easy balance! But I would want to be sure the racism discussion is relevant for and involves/invites the perspectives and experiences of whoever feels so called.

This caring and attentive mom is absolutely correct. I reached out to say that I am sorry for using language that in any way would exclude her daughter from the life of our congregation. I also would like to apologize for language or behavior that would seemingly deny or exclude others. This is never my intent.

As hard as we try, the Lord of Life staff and leadership often can’t see our own blind spots. As you can imagine, we give extensive time and attention to choosing our words and images for worship, social media, and otherwise. On occasion, that still isn’t enough. 

Pastor Lenny Duncan, author of Dear Church, says, “Grace is free. But loving the neighbor has a high cost…We are called to make sure that we create conditions that are conducive to grace and not hatred.” 

Thank you for being involved in ministry at Lord of Life and for being intentional about sharing words of encouragement, challenge, and correction. Together, we are able to clarify our mission and communicate more effectively to the world about a love that brings resurrection.

In faith and hope, 

Pastor Lowell

In addition to many other fantastic resources, the ELCA has some information on their Racial Justice Ministries.

If someone came up to you and asked you, “Who is Lord of Life Lutheran Church?”, what would you say to them? As people that are part of this community, we should be ready to answer that question. So, what would your answer be? I encourage you to post your answer on our social media and use #LordOfLifeExplained.

The main thing that defines us as Christians is our belief in a loving God and our gift of faith, which is placed in knowing that Jesus Christ came to show us a path to salvation. But what makes Lord of Life Lutheran Church different from other Christian churches? Our unique identity as a church is expressed in our mission statement, vision statement, and core values. Can you name one or all of those? 

A mission statement explains why your organization exists. We say our mission statement at the end of every church service: “To live, share, and celebrate, with all people, God’s love in Jesus Christ.” That mission is what compels us into action when we gather and when we go out into the world to serve God's mission and God’s people.

You might not know our vision statement or core values because they are just now being developed. Our vision statement is what we believe God is doing to change the world and how we fit into that plan. A good vision statement often seems insurmountable, but it motivates our actions and decisions to keep working toward that goal. Pray for our church council as they are currently working diligently through prayer and discussion to come up with our church’s vision statement. 

Finally, whether an organization knows it or not, they have core values. These are the underlying principles that make up the culture of the organization. Mike Ward, a non-profit consultant from GSB, puts it this way, “Your core values are the things that if not attended to (paid attention to) will cause problems in your organization.” Many churches that are experiencing panic, anger, and extreme frustration during this time of COVID-19 are likely not paying attention to their core values in how they are now interacting with congregation members.

Our church council, with much prayer and discernment, have identified our core values at Lord of Life as: Worship, Outreach, Inclusion, and Faith Formation. What do you think? Did they get it right? There may be other things we hold dear to us, but these are the main four that direct most of what we do as a congregation. I believe the reason that our congregation has continued to thrive during this time of physical distancing is because we have remained true to those core values. We are still producing quality worship, we are reaching out to help others, we are making choices in our worship presentation that make it more welcoming for worship guests to participate, and we are continuing to offer opportunities to grow in faith through Bible studies, book studies, and more. 

After we are done defining our key identity pieces (mission, vision, and core values) our church council will use these guiding statements to develop a road map for our immediate future, also known as a strategic plan. We will be including the congregation in portions of this strategic plan development and look forward to you helping us figure out how we can continue to “live, share, and celebrate, with all people, God’s love in Jesus Christ,” in new and exciting ways. 

What is Lord of Life Lutheran Church to you? Once again, I encourage you to post your answer on our social media and use #LordOfLifeExplained.

Venturing Forward,

Pastor Corey

Through the eyes of our nurses

We are grateful for all who love and serve during this season of COVID-19. Our blog this week includes reflections from some of the nurses in our Lord of Life community, including Kathy Calihan, Cindy Clay, Susan Clem, Katie Herdzik, Stephanie Keane, Marlene Kirkpatrick, and Becky Mastalerz.

You are encouraged to share this blog on your social media so that people can hear how faith has helped front line workers endure. Send our nurses a word of encouragement: post or comment using the hashtag, #LordofLifeNurses. Let's show them some love!

Katie Herdzik

I have spent most of my nursing career in Pediatric Oncology, with the transition into Care Management for this specialty in the fall. As you can imagine, this is a very difficult field emotionally and mentally, with my faith being frequently tested and challenged. I have to put my trust in God and his plan. I also cling to the success stories and the kids and adults who have gone on to live great lives and are doing well post-treatment. 

Sunday services at Lord of Life have always left me feeling rejuvenated and ready to take on the next week. I especially like to light candles for those who have passed on or are very ill. It is one of the things I miss the most right now from church. 

Our church has made me feel supported during this difficult time. Some things have been small, such as a handwritten card or mentioning of healthcare staff during service. The biggest impact has been connecting with some of the nurses from LOL through a group chat. Through this, we have been able to talk and express feelings, frustrations, and offer supportive encouragement and words of wisdom, as we all have different nursing backgrounds and experiences. As a new member, it is nice to meet (virtually) with new people and feel more connected to the church. I am looking forward to meeting these wonderful women in person someday. 

Stephanie Keane

The support of Lord of Life during this pandemic has been incredible. When the COVID-19 pandemic really started to become severe, I received a text from Pastor Lowell telling us that my mom and I, along with all healthcare workers, were in his prayers and to stay safe. 

When I returned from vacation in mid-March, it was to the news that my unit at work was going to be part of the COVID-19 ICU. Policies and guidelines were rapidly changing in order to provide the safest care and to keep patients and staff safe, including guidelines that patient families were unable to visit except in extreme situations. 

I kept thinking of Psalm 23: “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.” God has been with me and guiding me. I have been able to provide comfort and support to patients and their families who are suffering loss. I recall a family member of a patient telling me, “You and your coworkers are in our prayers. Thank you so much for caring for my loved one.”

I have been very grateful for the Facebook Live services and social media, which allow me to participate in services despite working. I was also able to share Easter Sunday services with a friend who would not have been able to participate otherwise. 

The cards, calls, and texts from Lord of Life have meant the world to me and helped me know that I have the support of the church and faith behind me, while going to work during one of the hardest times I’ve ever experienced. I cannot express how grateful I am for this support. 

Becky Mastalerz 

Having been a nurse in hospice, ICU, ER, and home care for the last 45 years, I have relied on my faith in God to carry me through the hard times. This has been true in times of death, birth, sickness, and things that happen that are just not fair. 

Lord of Life has been a place I can and have gone to in community to find the Spirit of God, as we each walk our daily lives as Christians. The support and fellowship experienced here are where our batteries are recharged for yet another day of life, being affirmed that life can be hard, but also being affirmed that God is so very good. Community is so important to my life. Through it, I am able to continue my walk with God and to also support others while still here to carry out our mission together.

Cindy Clay 

As nurses, we need a strong faith to let God's love shine through us in all that we do, so those who are in need may feel the loving Spirit, hear His voice, and be receptive to our comfort measures. I feel that nursing is not a job, but a calling. My faith always keeps me strong. Praying and reading the Scriptures helps keep my faith grounded. As nurses, we tend to run on empty and need our faith refueled and restored. The loving support of the people at Lord of Life does this for us, so we can live, share, and celebrate with all people, God's love in Jesus Christ while caring for others.

Marlene Kirkpatrick

I received a picture of the Army tents outside our hospital while I was on vacation, showing that our unit was now the COVID unit, followed by a phone call from our chief nurse telling me to return from vacation immediately. I knew this was going to be something like we have never experienced before. If it wasn’t for my faith in Jesus, I would not be able to step through the doors of our COVID unit. Knowing that he protects us is what gives me strength.

One of the hardest things during this COVID crisis is being with a patient who is dying without family at the bedside and they say their last goodbyes over the phone. It is truly heart-wrenching. The patient’s wife called later and thanked us for being with him and reminded the nursing staff that this was not goodbye, it was “I will see you later.”

I also want to thank everyone for making it possible to watch services online. It has been wonderful. They are even being watched on breaks during the night with other medical staff. This has reminded all of us we are in this together. The plastic headbands to keep the face mask elastic off the back of the ears are great, too. 

Susan Clem 

I’ve been an RN since 1988, and at that time, mostly practicing in the area of outpatient surgery. After some time away, I accepted  a position in psychiatric nursing, only expecting to work in that area until I found another position in surgery. However, I believe God had other plans for me. I have now been working in behavioral medicine for nearly eight years and love it! I can’t imagine working anywhere else. I feel God’s presence every day I’m at work, guiding me to say just the right thing or encouraging my patients and their families, especially on the busy days when there is one admission after another. It’s then, that God says to slow down and truly listen. It’s usually those times when I realize He has me right where he needs me, to hold a hand or offer sincere encouragement that things will get better. 

Lord of Life has given me the opportunity to help start a monthly support group at church, called HOPE, that supports and encourages families and friends of those who suffer with mental health issues. I feel blessed and supported at LOL and hope to pass those blessings on to my patients and coworkers in any way that God needs me.

Kathy Calihan 

As I am nearing retirement age, people always ask me when am I retiring. I tell them when I don’t have the strength to get out of bed. I love being a nurse, but in recent weeks my strength seems to be fading. Not my physical strength, but my mental strength. I have left the hospital so mentally drained that I go home and fall into bed and do not even eat. 

It has been good to connect with other nurses in the church through a group text. I can, and have, texted this group at all hours of the day and they have given me encouraging words to give me the strength to go to work the next day. 

I was reading my Bible the other day and I just randomly opened it to Isaiah and read these words: “But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.” Why this passage and at this time? I think the good Lord was reaching out to me to carry on.